They celebrated Mothers today. Motherhood. Well I can never find out how it feels to be a mother. For me the feeling of becoming a father took some time to sink in, however for the mother I think it was from the day we got the news. When it comes to the baby, suddenly mothers have all the patience in the world. And our daughter makes sure that its well tested. :)
Frankly speaking, I did not give much thought today to the special occasion until I came across a sad post on Reddit about how disheartening this day is for the lady, and how she hates it as it reminds her of her lost babies. Instantaneously this took me to my mother.
It will be over six years since I last saw my mother. We don't talk. The mere thought of meeting her sends shivers down my spine. And I may have be the last person on this planet she would want to talk to. I wonder how often she thinks that I failed her.
I am trying to think the first good memory I have of her. She got a chocolate for me in Kindergarten. She didn't like when I shared it with my friend. She wanted me to have it all. She played a prominent role in sending me to the boarding school which is by far one of the best thing that happened to me.
It was her, who used to come to meet me in school as my father was mostly busy working. I guess my teachers knew her more than my father. Once she had come to meet me, she found that my socks were dirty. She happened to visit on a day when the washerman had not showed up for a few days due to some issue. She forced me to be without socks for a day while she washed them. She convinced me that by the time I realize that I am without socks the socks will be ready to be worn again. She washed them and put them on some shrubs in the HeadMistress's garden. It turned out to be a bad day. It was hard to convince her that it was not needed.
She was always made sure that we never faced any problem. I would say that she always, like most Indian mothers, went out of her way to keep us happy. I never thought that I could live without her. But this is the thing with life that not everything happens according to the plan. There are incidents, events which play their part in defining the course of the journey. While she did more for me than what one could possibly imagine, some expectations slowly began to form over time. Expectation of a good job, which luckily, I was able to meet. Another major expectation was that I marry as per her wishes. And there, I faltered.
While I have never regretted my decision, there always will be a void which will remind me that not everything can be perfect in this world. We get somethings and we lose some. While many things happen which are not within our control, this one was my decision and I will have to live with it for rest of my life. Its sad that I had to chose between my mother and the mother of my daughter.
Happy Mothers' Day
Frankly speaking, I did not give much thought today to the special occasion until I came across a sad post on Reddit about how disheartening this day is for the lady, and how she hates it as it reminds her of her lost babies. Instantaneously this took me to my mother.
It will be over six years since I last saw my mother. We don't talk. The mere thought of meeting her sends shivers down my spine. And I may have be the last person on this planet she would want to talk to. I wonder how often she thinks that I failed her.
I am trying to think the first good memory I have of her. She got a chocolate for me in Kindergarten. She didn't like when I shared it with my friend. She wanted me to have it all. She played a prominent role in sending me to the boarding school which is by far one of the best thing that happened to me.
It was her, who used to come to meet me in school as my father was mostly busy working. I guess my teachers knew her more than my father. Once she had come to meet me, she found that my socks were dirty. She happened to visit on a day when the washerman had not showed up for a few days due to some issue. She forced me to be without socks for a day while she washed them. She convinced me that by the time I realize that I am without socks the socks will be ready to be worn again. She washed them and put them on some shrubs in the HeadMistress's garden. It turned out to be a bad day. It was hard to convince her that it was not needed.
She was always made sure that we never faced any problem. I would say that she always, like most Indian mothers, went out of her way to keep us happy. I never thought that I could live without her. But this is the thing with life that not everything happens according to the plan. There are incidents, events which play their part in defining the course of the journey. While she did more for me than what one could possibly imagine, some expectations slowly began to form over time. Expectation of a good job, which luckily, I was able to meet. Another major expectation was that I marry as per her wishes. And there, I faltered.
While I have never regretted my decision, there always will be a void which will remind me that not everything can be perfect in this world. We get somethings and we lose some. While many things happen which are not within our control, this one was my decision and I will have to live with it for rest of my life. Its sad that I had to chose between my mother and the mother of my daughter.
Happy Mothers' Day
